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How to save a marriage: where to start |
| Mary Goodwin |
First off, when you've reached the point of actually searching for information on how to save a marriage, you're probably feeling pretty lost, desperate, scared and alone. Let me assure you, you're not alone!
More than half of all marriages end in divorce. That's a sad, depressing and very unnecessary statistic.
There really are ways to reconnect to your partner. To fall in love all over again. Remember how it was in the beginning of your relationship? Yes, that passion and fire can be rekindled.
Many of us have been where you're at. We've felt that hopeless feeling. Then we reached out for information on how to save a marriage and advice from those who've been there, and we pulled ourselves out of that deep, depressing hole.
You need to sit down, calm yourself, and then get to work on formulating a plan to save your marriage. To reclaim your future and your happiness. And you need to take real, positive action. Right now. Today.
And no, it doesn't matter what's been done or what's been said. You can save a marriage no matter how much damage has been done. You can even begin to take concrete steps to save your marriage even if your spouse isn't yet motivated to do so.
Saving a marriage is very hard work and it takes time. You need that time to rebuild the love and trust that you've lost. You need to create new, happy memories together. You need to reduce the tension, have fun and laugh with each other again.
So, here we go with some step-by-step advice on how to save a marriage:
Step one is to change how you respond when communicating with your partner. Don't fall back into the trap of fighting. Be positive, if they're looking to fight, separate yourself from them until they calm down.
Fighting is a two-way street, it takes two to tango. Change your responses and eventually they will be forced to change their approach to a more positive one as well. To save your marriage, you will have to break the negative patterns.
After the stress and tension have calmed down, step two is to give them a gift, "just because I love you". Choose a gift that will remind your partner of your earlier, happier days together. See how we're connecting the happy past with the present?
Step three is to start dating again. Have a date night once a week, no matter what. You need this time together to rebuild your relationship, to reconnect to the feelings you both had when you first fell in love.
Step four on how to save a marriage is a biggie: go away together on a romantic vacation. Just the two of you. Even if just for a weekend. Don't fill this time with a lot of expectations, just have fun together!
Well, you've got some work to do, huh? But those of us that have been through it, and rebuilt our marriages, know that it's well worth it to feel that love and closeness with your sweetie again!
There you go, how to save a marriage, from someone who's been there. Even if it seems like you and your spouse are spiraling inevitably toward divorce, don't give up. Believe me, you can do this!
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| About the Author |
©2006 All rights reserved
For much more in-depth, step-by-step information on how to save a marriage, go to relationship expert Mary Goodwin's website which features reviews of all the best books on how to save your marriage: www.savingourmarriage.com
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